Swinging and swingers are not hell bent on destroying either marriage or relationships between couples in their more general scope. It is noteworthy however that monogamy is required for neither of the above, rather, it is society that assumes that the former cannot exist without the latter.
The concept of monogamous relationships has been inexorably tied to the institution of marriage between couples (as well as that of relationships in the 'commitment' phase). This more fluid version of monogamy can be seen as a sexual power shift in favor of women within the traditional monogamous relationship structure. This etiquette creates a situation where women enjoy a degree of sexual confidence, freedom and power that is rarely found in the outside world. The clandestine nature of swinging and the swinger's lifestyle community seems to have created an etiquette that all but expunges the possibility for violence or acrimonious conflict. This draws parallels from the gay cursing scene, where no always means no, and that a polite decline should never be taken personally. Another pillar of the swinging lifestyle is that polite acceptance and refusal are paramount to maintaining a healthy atmosphere in any swingers club or relationship. It is also an established expectation that couples should have discussed their boundaries prior to trying swinging. Regardless of the form of swinging lifestyle a couple is engaged in, the common rule that runs through all swinging relationships is that 'no means no' and that any behavior that brings discomfort or crosses any boundaries that the couples may set is anathema to the lifestyle. Group swinging refers to an orgy situation, notwithstanding that this term is not very popular with swingers, many swingers find that this form of swinging lifestyle simultaneously satisfies their desires for exhibitionism and voyeurism.It is also common practice that bisexual women wish to enjoy themselves together whilst their men watch.
This satisfies the individuals desire to watch and be watched, as well as that of watching their spouse with another person.